Coal

For the second day of our Holiday Bullshit promotion, we sent everyone tiny pieces of coal, which is exactly what they deserved, those assholes.

Sending out hundreds of thousands of pieces of coal is a classic case of “it looked easier on paper,” and we soon found ourselves calling coal mines across the U.S. to try and get weird little lumps that we could bag up like drugs and send to people. The coal pieces in the envelope had to be smaller than .25” for us to be able to afford to mail them (anything bigger than that counts as a parcel). Our printer AdMagic eventually found a coal company in Pennsylvania, the Reading Anthracite Coal Company, who agreed to supply us with coal pre-smashed into little pieces.

Then our mailing house in Boston bagged the little coal chunks by hand (see above; this was around the point where we started feeling like Holiday Bullshit had officially gotten out of control) and they were sent out.

We also worked with BBG to create an amazing 3D-rendered video for the coal using Cinema 4d and the Greyscale Gorilla Light Kit Pro, narrated by our friend Alex Warner, aka The British Voiceover Guy, which was a parody of our Bigger Blacker Box video.

We were pretty amazed we could get this done for $1.00 - here’s what the cost breakdown looked like:

Sending lumps of coal to 100,000 people was the most logistically difficult day of 12 Days of Holiday Bullshit, but after all of that work, at least we got to enjoy how much it delighted people.

Also our bank turned off our credit card after we bought the coal because it “triggered their fraud alarm.”

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    Totally worth it in the end. I enjoyed my coal and will treasure it always. Looking forward to next year.
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