What is this bullshit?
Last month, in a desperate bid for money and attention, we launched a holiday marketing campaign called “Cards Against Humanity’s 12 Days of Holiday Bullshit.” The gist was: you give us $12, we send you 12 mystery gifts over 12 days. HolidayBullshit.com is a way for non-participants to keep tabs on what we’re sending out, and for participants to be amused by videos, downloads, and dumb gimmicks we made based on each day’s theme.
Can I still sign up for the 12 Days of Holiday Bullshit?
No. This Bullshit was limited to 100,000 people and sold out in about six hours.
If I’ve already signed up, can I still change my address?
No. The wheels of destiny are in motion.
I didn’t receive one of my gifts! Should I panic?
No. Life is too short to panic over a $1 gift.
Why didn’t I receive one of my gifts?
We’re sending these packages from mailing houses all over the country, and due to holiday mail volume and bad weather, they are arriving on different days for different people. We expect that everyone will receive all 12 of their gifts before Christmas. If you haven’t gotten one of your gifts, your best option is to be thankful for what you have and wait patiently for it to arrive. If you get bored you could donate money to help some orphans or something and learn about the true meaning of holiday bullshit.
I really want to email you about not receiving a gift before Christmas.
If you’d like us to passive-agressively copy/paste this FAQ into an email, you can send us a message at Mail+EntitledWhining@CardsAgainstHumanity.com.
What should I do if I don’t receive all of my gifts by Christmas?
If you don’t have all 12 of your gifts after Christmas, email us at firstname.lastname@example.org and we will help you out.
One of my gifts was damaged!
If you’d like us to replace a missing or lost gift, please wait until after Christmas and then shoot us a brief email. We don’t want or care about your whole life story, just let us know what happened in a single sentence.
What if I don’t like one of my gifts?
What if your expectations for the quality of your life are too high?
What’s this about a puzzle?
What’s this about your question?
I’ve solved the puzzle!
You have not even begun to solve the puzzle. The person or group who solves the puzzle will know that they solved it, and know what to do next.